He’ll be here in 3 hours.
She thought to herself in a melodramatic panic.
What should I wear? My makeup, my hair… What shall I do?
She really wants to impress you.
She wants to stop you in your tracks.
She takes time to prepare, so that when you see her you can’t help but stare.
Remember the days when women were the prize?
When men would go to the moon and back and work, sweat and bleed
all to have your heart in their hands and your arm on their sleeve.
So she takes her time to paint her face
Highlighting her best features… Covering up her flaws…
hoping that when you see the finished product you’ll appreciate it all.
She goes through 3 different hairstyles until she finds the right one.
She stares at her reflection.
Is this it? Am I done? Am I…enough
She looks at her body… overly critical
Choosing something to wear will be much harder
Accentuate this, cover up that…
Convincing herself that he will
She examines herself from head to toe.
Three and a half hours later and there’s a knock at her door.
She approves so she believes that
He’ll like what he sees
she approaches the door…
He greets her like she’s one of the boys
No reaction. No compliment.
What she really wants to do is close the door and spend the night in her bed
but she closes the door and gets into his car instead.
Candle light. Soft music. By the water. Beautiful. Good choice. At least she has the ambiance…
Because his attention is everywhere else.
The tourist that just walked by.
His social media wall…
I had a great time he says…
she smiles and lets him kiss her.
But she slips away from arms that feel more like slimy claws enclosing her
Behind her the door closes.
Tears burn in her eyes. She is angry…
But she doesn’t ask for anything. Maybe she should
She doesn’t say anything.
If only she would.
But why bother? Isn’t love the greatest teacher?
How can you not see
The damage that you do to me? How could you not know?
She left. Slipped away. Like a thief in the night. He didn’t see it coming.
She didn’t bother explaining. Some things have no words.
Now she dresses for another date. She always gets tens across the board, full attention
And date nights are always fun.
Oh, how much more beautiful I feel when my only critique is me
when I am my own audience
Oh, how lovely life has been since I started dating a queen.
I am as happy and confident as I can be
since I started dating me.
(Written by Cassie-Ann Robin, FRIDAY, MAY 6, 2016)